The Aftermath of Dealing with the Drunken Dwarf and Giantess
by pinkish-red hearts
Summary: Jaime gets a call from an obviously drunk Tyrion to pick him and Brienne up from their date. He was not happy with what he saw as he came. In fact, Jaime hasn't been happy the whole week.


**Author's Note: May have been inspired from the Emmys photo. I think you'll know which picture by paragraph three XD**

 **I've posted this on my ao3 and I was too lazy to post it here cause I was busy. Because it was school and JB week as well. XD Speaking of which, I think this counts as reluctance and honor? Maybe throw in a little betrayal, duty, protection and longing? And of course, LOVE. Yep, I got all 7 days covered in a fic ;) Lol God knows I'm shit at ship weeks but this wasn't exactly intended as ship week but whatever. This is all just about fun right? :D**

"Bye Tyrion."

Jaime's eyes rolled when Brienne, who was seated, leaned closer to his little brother, who had stood beside her seat to kiss the back of her hand in a gentlemanly goodbye.

Then, Jaime's eyes nearly popped out of their sockets when she planted a smack on Tyrion's lips.

"For the record, you're _both_ going with me, wench," Jaime said in a shaky voice. "You're not fit to drive either."

Brienne pouted. Under different circumstances, Jaime would have laughed and used this as an opportunity to tease her. But he was in a mood at that moment.

In fact, he had been for a whole week.

 _What the fuck is my brother playing at?_

Jaime loved his brother but he had a… questionable… dating lifestyle. Tyrion went through women like one went through pajamas. He discarded them after taking them to bed. Jaime indulged his perverted brother's choices as long as they were consensual- which all of them were, of course. Deep inside, he knew Tyrion did this because he believed that no one could truly love him especially with his disability.

But they sure loved Lannister riches.

Which was why Jaime found it weird that Tyrion asked Brienne out for a date.

Brienne was Jaime's best friend and he often invited her over to his and Tyrion's joint place. At first, Brienne had scowled at Tyrion even more than she had with Jaime when they first met but eventually, she grew on Tyrion. (Well, almost quite literally.) They hung out like normal friends as far as Jaime could see so he didn't think Tyrion would be interested in dating Brienne. Besides, his brother's type is the typical feminine-looking girls who are likely a good lay. Brienne certainly did not fit any of those categories. She's neither feminine, at least mostly physically, nor a good lay. She was a virgin after all. Besides, she and Jaime would laugh at whatever bimbo Tyrion would date.

Which was why Jaime found it even weirder that Brienne agreed.

They had done it in front of Jaime as well. It had been a lazy day and they just finished watching some soppy rom com that Jaime and Brienne both loved but not Tyrion. The younger Lannister just watched with them to make snarky comments.

"Brienne," Tyrion had said. "It's such a shame people don't see how absolutely singular you are. Your experience with dating had been terrible, no?"

Brienne nodded with a blush.

"What about you and me next week at the Dornish restaurant? Let me show you how a gentleman should really treat a lady."

Jaime had laughed at that immediately. It had taken him quite a long time to recover.

His laughter had immediately ceased when Brienne said yes.

For the whole week, Jaime had tried talking Tyrion out of it.

"Bro, you've got to be kidding me. Brienne is _not_ like the other girls you're dating, you know."

"Well, it's a good thing you know that," Tyrion snapped. There was something about his tone that didn't sit well with Jaime.

Jaime had tried talking Brienne out of it but for some reason, she didn't want to talk to him at all. _Busy_ , she kept saying. Jaime couldn't help but feel that he might have done something wrong.

"Carry me, brother," Tyrion drawled, waving his little arms in the air and snapping Jaime back to the present. He knew his brother wasn't as drunk as he appeared to be, so he granted his request- by hauling him up with one arm around the waist and carried the little man against Jaime's hip as if he were a sack of grain- Tyrion's torso and legs dangling from the elder Lannister's arm. Jaime held out his hand for Brienne but she refused to take it, steadying herself with the backrest. He watched her take one, two steps without holding on to the backrest before she tripped on her own heels. Jaime's other arm immediately shot out to catch her, internally cursing those infernal shoes that she claimed too many times that she hated. Brienne protested when he told her to lean on him for support while he wrapped his other arm at her waist but she didn't move away from him at all.

They must have been quite the sight as Jaime hauled his brother and best friend out of the restaurant- an average man carrying a drunken dwarf and giantess. It's like the stuff of modern adult fairytales. When they got to his car, Tyrion was tossed into the front seat while Brienne was gently laid into the back seat.

During the whole ride, Brienne and Tyrion had been singing a supposed pop rendition of "Bear and the Maiden Fair" but they were so off key, Jaime's head pounded in irritation.

When the car stopped in front of the Lannister brothers' home, the two finally shut up. Jaime got out of the car and brisk walked to Tyrion's side.

"Gimme a kiss goodbye, my little dwarf," Brienne said with a laugh as Jaime carried his little brother in his arms like a baby.

"Your little dwarf's ass is going to his own bed. You stay here, Bri," Jaime commanded.

"It's such a shame to deprive the lady from my ass, brother," Tyrion snorted and Brienne laughed way too hard. It wasn't even that funny.

"You're an ass," Jaime muttered as he walked away from the car and toward the house. Once he opened the front door, it was all he could do not to carelessly drop his little brother like a bag.

"I don't know what kind of game you're playing, Tyrion, but I don't like Brienne being used as conquest," Jaime accused his little brother, but Tyrion only smirked- his black and green eye gleaming in mischief.

"I'm going to sleep on the couch," Tyrion only replied. "Make sure the lady gets home safe."

Jaime stomped back to the car to find Brienne dozing in the backseat. _Good_. Brienne had never been this drunk and he wasn't really sure how to deal with it. The drive to her apartment was silent, only background noise and Brienne's snoring filling it.

Upon parking on the side of the road in front of the apartment, Jaime quickly got off and went to the backseat to help Brienne up. Her apartment room was on the third floor after all. She was curled up in a fetal position with Jaime in danger of getting kicked at the crotch should Brienne stretch. He crawled inside the meager leg space to avoid getting kicked. As he positioned himself as comfortable as he could manage, Jaime thought of how he was going to handle her. It would seem cruel to wake her up. Absentmindedly, he rested one of his hands on her back and the other slid to her waist. He gave a light tug when Brienne's eyes fluttered open.

"Jaime…" she whispered, shifting her position and laying on her back with her legs barely shifting its position. It looked somewhat uncomfortable but Jaime was glad for it. Brienne would probably never forgive him if he allowed her to flash her underwear in public even if no one was there.

"Stupid wench," he muttered. "What were you thinking? I love my brother but you know how he is."

"You laughed," she croaked. Something stung at Jaime's heart hearing that broken tone, even though he wasn't sure what she meant.

Brienne suddenly frowned though, quickly returning his sour mood as well. "Tyrion and I weren't even doing anything," Brienne said defensively. "We were just being friendly."

"Friendly," Jaime spat a little too bitterly. "Yet you agreed to wear that dress Tyrion likely picked out for you, hm?" Tyrion was known to be a bit of a female fashion expert. He had a knack of knowing what kind of clothing shows off a woman's best assets. And boy did it highlight Brienne's best physical attributes.

She wore a dark blue cocktail dress- so dark that they looked almost black. It was enough to make her creamy skin stand out, her short blonde hair shine and most especially her blue eyes sparkle. The dress hugged her in the right places and showed off her curves infinitely better than her preferred baggy shirts and sweats. The length of it is above knee- still decent than most dresses but when she sat down, it showed a lot of leg. Her heels- a black strapped thing with snakes coiling at the actual heel that must've been 5 or six inches- were highlighting her legs even more.

Jaime remembered how his brain had momentarily shut down when Brienne arrived to pick up Tyrion. He swallowed thickly. His throat felt parched all of a sudden.

"It was mine from before," Brienne huffed. "It was the only sexy dress I have."

"Oh and why would you wear a sexy dress, hm, wench?" Jaime replied more gently now. "If you were only being _friendly_ with my brother."

"Maybe I wanted to be _not_ friendly with someone else?"

Jaime snorted. "Who? The valet? The server? Were you planning to go whoring with Tyrion?"

There was a light pressure on Jaime's chest, slowly sliding upwards to his neck. Jaime was suddenly too aware of their position- he half-looming over her with his hands on her while she caressing his neck with gentle strokes. Soon, Brienne's other hand lifted and touched his cheek. Jaime was becoming aware of his straining pants as well.

"You laughed at me, Jaime," Brienne whined. "Tyrion asked me out and called me a lady and you laughed when he did. I was punishing you... with that 'yes', with my silence, with this dress that my tailor said makes me look super hot."

And it finally dawned on Jaime the real cause of this whole thing. "You thought I was laughing at your femininity? Dateability? Because my brother is fond of pretty things and would never be attracted to you?"

Brienne's hands quickly retreated and ended up awkwardly on her chest. She bit her lip and nodded.

"Gods, Brienne!" Jaime exclaimed. "I didn't mean it like that. I just really see you two as friends and find the thought of you two dating to be hilarious, seeing as we made fun of all his dumb dates. Besides, my brother's a pervert. I would find it horribly disturbing if he dates you like his usuals. Lucky he called to ask me to pick you up."

"Tyrion was right," Brienne drawled. "You should make a move. I wore this dress just for you, you know."

Jaime looked at her to see if she was lying but Brienne rarely lied, and if she did, he'd know. Usually, Brienne's best lies were her silence, yet whatever alcohol Tyrion _poisoned_ her with, it definitely made her bolder and- if it were possible- more truthful.

"Brienne…"

"Jaime, why are you so annoying?" she whined.

"There's the Brienne that I know," he chuckled.

"Yet so nice," she added.

"I do my best," he hummed, not sure where this conversation was going.

"Jaime, you're so hot."

Brienne's hands returned around his neck once more. Jaime knew he should move away. This was not appropriate and he shouldn't take advantage of Brienne like this. Yet there had always been a feeling stirring within him that concerned Brienne but he never wanted to acknowledge because he didn't want to ruin what they had. Besides, he wasn't sure she felt the same way.

Perhaps Brienne was a better liar than they both thought.

Or they were both in such a great state of denial.

He could see it in her eyes- her astonishing sapphires that had been the death of him since he saw her.

"I hate that I'm hopelessly in love with you."

Jaime couldn't take it anymore.

He smashed his lips hard into hers.

For a millisecond, Jaime panicked, wondering if he hurt her with his sudden roughness, but Brienne tightened her hold on his neck and pressed her face closer to his. Jaime was a little shocked at her boldness but his fingers dug into her skin in desperation. This prompted Brienne to make a little gasp which made Jaime open his mouth to devour her soft lips. He could taste strawberry lip gloss in them. Brienne squirmed and one of her hands left his neck and hovered over his back- unsure of where to place it at first until it decided to settle an inch or two above his ass. It was Jaime's turn to gasp and Brienne used this opportunity to dart her tongue out into his mouth. Jaime eagerly sucked at the invader in his mouth. She tasted like vodka. Somehow, it snapped Jaime out of his lust.

He quickly moved away from Brienne who whimpered at the loss of contact. Her blue eyes looked lustful and pleading yet so heartbreakingly innocent. They weren't touching anymore, even their arms were back at their own sides but it took all of his willpower not to tackle her once more seeing her bruised lips and face that rivaled the Lannister crimson.

"I'm sorry, Brienne. I… shouldn't have done that… at least not when you're in this state," Jaime sighed. "That was not very chivalrous of me and I know how you like your gentlemen."

He made a tone of light tease in the end in hope to lighten the mood but Brienne look like she was about to cry. It broke Jaime's heart. "N-no, Brienne. Don't misunderstand," he pleaded. "That kiss was- amazing. I'm quite surprised how adept you are at this and I swear to the Seven I'd take you right now if I could but I want you sober."

Brienne nodded. She still looked doubtful but at least she didn't look like she was going to burst into tears. Jaime sighed and smiled softly.

"Come on, Brienne. Let me take you home."

She lifted her arms like an eager child and Jaime rolled his eyes. _Was this how Brienne felt when I'm being childish?_ He wrapped his arms around her back while she wrapped hers around his neck. Jaime pulled her up, grunting at her weight. _She's not even trying to make herself light_ , he thought, but it was worth it just to feel her on him once more.

After securing his car, they walked to the apartment, up several stairs, and into her apartment using his spare. He slept over her place so much that he had his own set of keys. When he finally reached her room after securing the lock on the main door, he carefully deposited her in her bed. She yawned while stretching and settled herself comfortably under her covers. Jaime looked to her one last time before turning away.

"Stay," Brienne mumbled. It caused Jaime to whip his head back to her. Brienne looked at him with half closed eyes but they were begging all the same.

"It's alright. I can still drive back to my house. I still have to take care of Tyrion," he explained weakly. They both know Tyrion was going to be alright. Not helping his words was a long yawn that opened his mouth so wide his jaw made a cracking sound.

"You look like a roaring lion," she noted randomly before saying, "Just stay."

"Alright but I'll take the couch. I think my whole body's been imprinted in it anyway."

"Stay," she told him once more, patting the space beside her. Jaime actually felt himself blush.

"Just to sleep," she grunted as if sensing what his thoughts were. Her heavily lidded eyes still managed to glare at him and her lips were pouting and demanding.

"Okay, fine but don't kick me in the morning."

He removed his shoes and jacket- keeping his shirt on to keep some decency about them. Brienne hadn't even changed out of her dress. He slid under the covers and she immediately wrapped her arm around him.

"Good night, Jaime," she said before kissing his cheek. Jaime's face was heating up at the gentleness of it, much different than the roughness earlier but equally welcomed.

Jaime turned his body to face her and moving higher so that it seemed that he was taller than her. "Good night, Brienne," he replied, then, kissed her forehead just as gently. "I love you so much."

Once again, Brienne looked like she was going to cry but this time, her face split into a wide smile. It was one of her rare smiles and to be the cause of it made Jaime's heart swell. Then, she buried her head into his shoulder. _I could get used to this_ , Jaime thought as he could feel her hot breath on her skin. His body was slowly shutting down. Without a thought, he placed his hand on her hip, then trailing up and down her thigh. His mind was beginning to shut down as well. The hand caressing her was getting slower and slower as he grew sleepier and sleepier.

Just when he was about to really sleep. Brienne's leg stirred. He felt it thrown over his hip as she snuggled even closer to him. His whole body stilled. His hand felt the seam of the dress that was riding way too high for his liking. Needless to mention, her underwear was rubbing against his…

Jaime struggled to get away but Brienne was firmly gripping him. Her other arm slipped around his neck possessively. He swore he heard a low growl rumbling on his shoulder.

Too tired to fight but too aware to sleep, Jaime remained still as Brienne basically cocooned him.

With a soft groan, he tried to will himself to sleep, but Brienne's occasional wriggling was not helping his arousal at all.

Jaime could only sigh.

This was going to be a long night.

 **Author's Note: I think they would have a bit of reversal of roles if Brienne was drunk. Brienne would be bolder and loud while Jaime would be shy and lost half the time. This was really fun to do. :P**

 **Don't be reluctant. Do your duty as a reader and honor me with your comments. :3**


End file.
